Lately, I’ve felt completely haggard, frazzled and like I’m running with my head chopped off trying to stay above water most days. As someone who, prior to becoming a mom, was very type A, productive and organized, this lifestyle is hard for me to adjust to. You would think that I would have mastered the principle that Aiden pretty much runs the show over here by now, but somewhere deep inside of me, I still try to hold onto a little bit of control. Don’t get me wrong – there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t feel blessed to be the one that explores his little world with him, teaches him, and gets to witness most of his “firsts.”
I, however, need to also realize that if I’m not taken care of, no one in the house is going to be. I think the phrase “happy wife, happy life” is utterly true in this instance. The past few months, I’ve felt like there is little left over for myself in terms of energy and time. I’ve been slipping in motivation simply because I’m just too tired to do it all.
I went to my midwife for the good ol’ yearly exam and we talked for close to an hour about life. (P.S. this is one of the things I love about midwives – they don’t rush you out the door.) She reassured me that it’s okay to long to sleep through the night, want some peace and quiet and to have a girl’s weekend occasionally. It made me feel better and let go of some of the mom guilt. I feel like I’m supposed to absolutely love every single minute of being a mother and that’s really unrealistic.
During that appointment, I realized that I’ve missed two bedtimes in Aiden’s life and I’ve never been away from him longer than 6 hours in 16 months and that was 8 months ago. I have reached a point that I need a little break to regain some serenity for myself.
What Am I Going To Do About This?
I talked to my husband and we went to the drawing board and agreed that when I feel exhausted or like I need a break, I just need to ask. I hate asking for help so this will be a challenge.
I wish we had more childcare options, but we don’t at this point in our lives, so David and I divide the responsibilities and that’s just fine.
I am going to do more things just for me however small that may be!
- Get lost in a book
- Make sure I continue to go on my solo weekend run
- Paint my nails
- Watch TV alone and without doing work
- Take a nap
- Go to the coffee shop
All of those things sound glorious! Now I just have to actually do it:)
What is your self-care?
What makes you feel rejuvenated and refreshed? A day at the spa also sounds really nice!